We all began with the same randomly-chosen first line and passed sheets of paper, folding them down as we went, so only the last-written line could be seen. The result: well, see for yourself!
Poems (the collections of lines)
By Allison and Ben Eyring-Green, Elissa and Chris Jones, Jenn and Dan
Tyler, and Sarah (neighbor). 12/8/07.
The babies came soon afterwards
In their way, as men deteriorate after drinking
Tilting left and right, twirling hither and thither
The loose sign on the post could no longer be trusted for directions
Well, hmm, indeed.
But no harrumph for you, dumbass. Huh-uh.
You get what you deserve – a dumb look and a backslap
Worthless to the governor, asleep in the garage
Your state tax dollars at work
Just think, it could’ve been a quarter million dollar toilet.
The babies came soon afterwards
Why weren’t you more careful? I asked him
He had, drunkenly, dumped Blatz down my blouse
Which, I guess, is worse than doing it sober.
Sobriety kills the devil’s work
But the devil’s work is never done, alas
“Where ever there are innocent lads to be tempted, I’ll be there”
But then I’ll leave, because frustration is worse than temptation
That’s why you should never eat wax fruit.
The vitamin C of bees frozen in time.
The babies came soon afterwards
His swimmers could swim after all!
He was relieved, but not surprised
A nice ham and cheese sandwich goes a long way
Unless you’re Jewish
In which case, prepare for the worst
Apocalypse: watch ye therefore
And let’s not forget the tales of yore
When sugar plum fairies and dainty girls roar!
Since the strength of the soul is in our roar
The babies came soon afterwards
Hairy chested and reeking of garlic
They must be Tony’s, I thought
So delicious; robust
There I go talking about my bust again
But really, the girls are sooo fine
I mean just look at them!
Good God man; have you no dignity?!
Michael Stipe called, he wants McCarthy back
It’s the end of the poem as we know it, and it’s Un-American
The babies came soon afterwards
In two’s, three’s, and dozens more
And shoes, jeez, why she’s a whore!
A whore!! A whore!! A whore, of course!!
It was the whore who seduced my lover!
One of those mean ladies who never shares cookies
And kicks puppies, just because – she doesn’t even like it.
You know God’s going to get her for it.
With a most scouring burning bush
And a most delightful sculpted tush!
The babies came soon afterwards
Followed shortly by two goats, a slightly ill-tempered pig, and a
three-humped camel
Which Papa traded for a bottle of whiskey and a box of diapers
The first Scotch and the second Irish
The first Noel of her second marriage
The new beginning, he would not disparage
Instead he set up a new middle in his garage
Although, he isn’t a carpenter – so don’t look too close
If I had a hummer
I’d be a schmuck with an inferiority complex and entitlement issues
The babies came soon afterwards
Carried in their strong mothers’ arms
The fathers are next door
Fighting off a horde of sober, angry Vikings
They’re always worse when they’re sober, just like Italian
mother-in-laws
Their in-laws, they’re fantastic; our hours
Time, it passes so slowly
Like light reflecting off the elephant’s eye
The moonlight shone so bright o’er the Sarenghetti.
One way or another, it will all be over soon enough.
The color of Ellen’s cheek changed
Yet another day of water skiing gone terribly wrong
The boat, the boyfriend, the bad pop song
Churned in her mind through another sleepless night
She went to the window and watched the moon rise
That’s amore
The more the better
Although, the more you love human kind, your not always better off
The color of Ellen’s cheek changed
In the frost bitten afternoon light
Cold, dead, freezing night…
The kind of night to stop a heart from beating
Of the feeling was hardly flattering
It was frozen, solid, a new institution
And there, in the midst of it,
The sparks began to fly like fireflies in the night
The color of Ellen’s cheek changed
As she recovered from the illness
Green, orange, yellow and blue flicks covered the wall
“Bad art” I said to myself
The torn canvas could be a new fad
She decided to wear it as a hat
But then it started meowing
And then came the ninjas.
The color of Ellen’s cheek changed
In a manner so warm to me
She snuggled up against my chest
And fell to dreaming of me instead
I’m sleepy.
The snow is falling so softly, and the cold is now not so bitter.
The postman may now rest, rest forever
Frozen in the snow.
The color of Ellen’s cheek changed
Who is this Ellen anyway?
Ellen works at the local jewel shop and is a romantic.
Jewelry, roses, and champagne are so fantastic
Just ask Dan!
I sat to her right, and nodded yes again
She raised her eyebrows and motioned upstairs
And followed him by the banister
The color of Ellen’s cheek changed
Brad had smacked her after she called him a no-good cheating bastard
He being a no-good cheating bastard and all
You might as well kill a guy
If a guy can be killed by the scowl of an old woman’s face
Then a woman can rejoice with the change of pace
A false celebration
A masterful contradiction
The color of Ellen’s cheek changed
And I thought, I always knew she was an alien
Because her mannerisms were so obscure
I wondered what country she was from
Reeling as she did of pickles and buttermilk
I don’t mind cucumbers, but not pickles
Pickles are so salty, but the crisp is nice.
End soggy pickles – leave the kingdom!
